Some men are relationship guys. These are guys who fret if they don't have a girlfriend and their encounters with women, from flirting to dating to sex, are geared toward that end. They tend to be rather picky about the women they socialize with, but there's a pre-emptive quality about their pickiness----they tend to be very sensitive about being rejected.
Then, there are the men with the roving eyes.
Last weekend, I was at Nick's when the female companion of a friendly acquaintance caught my eye. I avoided looking at her out of respect for Marla but when I went to the bar for drinks she introduced herself and mentioned that she had seen me here before. We exchanged a couple pleasantries and she asked if I had come in with "the black girl." I said, yes, that's my girlfriend Marla and maybe you and your friend can come over and say hi to us.
I took our drinks back to the table and Marla said,
"That girl is interested in you."
The thing was, I was attracted to her, too. She had that early 30s ironical hipster art student look I find so attractive. But, of course, I told her that I have a girlfriend. And I kept my eyes away from her for the rest of the evening.
Two nights ago, my upstairs neighbor, a medical student, had a get-together with her friends and invited the building over. I found myself in a conversation with a cellist---the kind of conversation you have after several drinks and the rapport comes easily and you make eye contact and laugh and you both know the attraction is there. Our hostess walked by and my companion said,
"This guy is your neighbor? He's cool."
I extricated myself from the conversation a few minutes later.
The amazing thing about Marla is that she gives me no trouble at all. I'm used to the drama that comes with relationships and I expect a certain amount of nagging and unpleasantness recriminations and I'm not getting them. She's laid back as hell, socially great and all my friends love her. Unfortunately, I keep feeling this powerful attraction to other women.
Yes, there are relationship guys and then there are the rest of us.....
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3 comments:
i think we're all attracted to other people, no matter how 'taken' or committed we are as couples.
it's just..
some of us are honest about it, and then there are the others...
Oh yes, kudos to D.L.S. for being honest with his blog readers.
dls is interest at the very least.. that's for sure.
too many losers out there that try to be something they're not. and it shows through in their boring blogs.
keep writing dls
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