A Very Unusual Shower

I got a call from Mar on Sunday, inviting me for bloody marys. I wasn't doing anything at the time, so I agreed to meet her at the brunch restaurant I had introduced her to and effectively ceded to her after our breakup.

She invited me to get a drink on her tab and began talking about her real estate investment scheme which, as far as I could tell, involved flipping property and "kicking money upstairs." Ostensibly so she would have more money for graduate school. When I told her that I didn't have money to invest, she switched the topic to her sometime boyfriend, L. She had opened an e-harmony account. L, she said, was putting her to sleep. He never wanted to do anything and she missed the plays, movies, picnics and concerts that she and I used to attend. I listened to her and ordered another bloody.

After a couple drinks, I told her that I had to get to the tanning salon.

"Can I come too? I've always wanted to try tanning."

So, I used a guest pass on her. She found it very relaxing. After we were finished:

"Can I shower at your place, David? My shower is leaking into the wall."

So, we wound up in the shower together. When I moved to kiss her, she drew back.

"I don't think L would like it if we slept together."

I thought to myself: no he wouldn't. He didn't like it when we slept together before. He wouldn't like your eharmony account either. Nor the fact that we're in the shower together.

Mar started crying, her tears blending with the water from the shower. "I don't want to be a bad person, David. I don't. I love you...."

I got out of the shower, dried myself off, grabbed a magazine and lay down on my bed. Mar was in the room a few minutes later, typing away at the computer. We had played this game before.

"Mar," I said, "I'm going to have to ask you to leave the room for a few minutes."

"Why?"

"I need to masturbate. I'm a little worked up."

"I can be here for that, can't I?"

"Oh....you wanna watch?"

"Yes."

She got on the bed and watched me begin. Then she started crying again.

"Don't take advantage of me David. Don't play me."

"How am I taking advantage? You have your clothes on. I'm the one who's naked. I'm not touching you, am I?"

"I would leave L for you in a second..."

She took over for me. First with her hands, then with her mouth. When we had finished, we lay back on the bed together. Then I put on some Digable Planets. We spent the afternoon singing along to cheesey 80s videos on youtube. Then we ordered Chinese. Then we watched a DVD of the 90s MTV show Liquid Television. Then we made love for a long time. Then we fell asleep.

It made me think: some of the best sex I've had has been post-breakup sex. For old times sake because one of you might meet someone so this could be the last time better make it count sex. The pleasant smell of a familiar body that knows where to touch you from experience, and vice-versa. The healthy thing is to quit an ex cold turkey. The fun thing is to enjoy the occasional sessions. While they last.